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iggy Posted: Sun Jun 20 14:05:37 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  simpleman journals.
21062004
road to somewhere.


woke up in the morning to a ringtone i thought i would not hear anymore. it gives me certain comfort in hearing her voice on the other line.
but if that's the best i can get, i'd be happy.

sundays will never be the same again. i miss waking up and knowing that there's her next to me.

fathers day dinner.
it was civil. but that's always been that way.
had the chance to talk to them about my choice. wasn't really good.
my mum as usual tried to use emotional blackmail to make me stay in the company
"our company needs you"
"see how bad we feel"
"we're doing this for you"
"the fortune teller says u will not succeed outside other than here"

why must they make me feel like crap? i tried for 3 fucking years. giving up my dreams, my passion.
is the company bigger than my life and dreams?

"stay for one more project... finish this project and u can go..."

one more year? then i'm gonna be 30. start my career change when i'm 30?

one more year. then they will ask for one more year.

my dad looked me in the eye for the first time in the evening

"loser."
"you won't survive on your own."

i'll prove you wrong.
i'll prove all of you wrong.




 
antartica Posted: Sun Jun 20 14:12:51 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  lets rock and roll....


 
Mouse Posted: Sun Jun 20 14:19:26 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Hang in there. *hugs* You can do it, chanz.


 
libra Posted: Sun Jun 20 14:41:22 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  I'm sorry you have to go through so much at once, Chanz. But you deserve a life that you want. You have the right to create something for yourself. Good luck, and lots of hugs.


 
Mark Posted: Sun Jun 20 15:17:57 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  They cannot force you…only by emotional black mail, like you said they did. Trying to make you feel bad if you don’t stay, but it will make you feel bad if you stay. Will you feel bad when you pursuit your dreams? Sometimes you’ll need to be a bit of an ego and choose for yourself. You cannot always satisfy others.

In the end it is your choice. Do what feels right (or gives you the least bad feelings)



 
addi Posted: Sun Jun 20 18:04:58 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Parental emotional blackmail. Grew up dealing with that from my father.
If I ever pull that shit on my son somebody here please come and slap me hard.
Like reading these chanz. Hope it helps you to put things down into words.
Hang in there


 
Mesh Posted: Sun Jun 20 18:57:16 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Chanz dude, youre awesome. Do whatever the damn fuck you want.


 
iggy Posted: Mon Jun 21 05:20:39 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Simpleman journals.
22062004

New dawn.

The strange things u discover when u lose things in your life.

i discovered there are a lot of people that care and will always be there for you no matter how far they are.

just sent out resumes. waiting for answers. they way i see it. i will be out of a job for a while.

damn. have to take up temp jobs. but the money will be useful.

so much have been lost.
so much have been gained too.

just wished i never have to learn this way.

still wish that when i wake up, this will all be a dream.
still wish she returns.




 
antartica Posted: Mon Jun 21 06:41:45 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  he's not heavy, he's my brother...


 
mat_j Posted: Mon Jun 21 12:56:25 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Hey dude keep the faith, you can win this, i need you to be able to succeed, i want to turn up at Cannes in three years time with Paulo to shake your hand then go and harrass the models who lie on the boats, then get drunk on Champagne and order 50 pizzas to Tarantinos hotel room!




 
libra Posted: Mon Jun 21 16:41:06 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  mat_j said:
>Hey dude keep the faith, you can win this, i need you to be able to succeed, i want to turn up at Cannes in three years time with Paulo to shake your hand then go and harrass the models who lie on the boats, then get drunk on Champagne and order 50 pizzas to Tarantinos hotel room!
>
>

ooo, can i come?


 
ifihadahif Posted: Mon Jun 21 16:50:19 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  libra said:
>mat_j said:
>>Hey dude keep the faith, you can win this, i need you to be able to succeed, i want to turn up at Cannes in three years time with Paulo to shake your hand then go and harrass the models who lie on the boats, then get drunk on Champagne and order 50 pizzas to Tarantinos hotel room!
>>
>>
>
>ooo, can i come?
>
Dunno, do you come often ?


 
Mesh Posted: Mon Jun 21 16:51:13 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  LOL HIF!



hooray for mat_j.




















My arms itch like crazy.


 
mat_j Posted: Thu Jun 24 09:32:07 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  libra said:
>mat_j said:
>>Hey dude keep the faith, you can win this, i need you to be able to succeed, i want to turn up at Cannes in three years time with Paulo to shake your hand then go and harrass the models who lie on the boats, then get drunk on Champagne and order 50 pizzas to Tarantinos hotel room!
>>
>>
>
>ooo, can i come?

You'll have to come gadnamit!!


 



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