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Hi all
iggy Posted: Thu Jul 8 01:21:17 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  it's been a while since i last came in.
i've just started interning at a local production house.
am doing a lifestyle programme now. :)

other than that.
am coming to grips with a few things in life.

healthwise, not doing too good.

it's pretty rough.
things just keep coming.


antartica Posted: Thu Jul 8 02:07:13 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  oh a DBF!! haha...

welcumm back bro =)

antartica Posted: Thu Jul 8 02:14:19 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  chanz said:
>.......healthwise, not doing too good.
>i keep coming.

you say it like it's a bad thing....
*ok ok my bad.. i'm an asshole...*
couldn't resisit it... sorry brah... =P

libra Posted: Thu Jul 8 03:31:45 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  hang in there chanz, i'm glad you found a job, and i'm sorry things are piling up...

luv ya,

dan632 Posted: Thu Jul 8 03:37:15 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  hello Mr Chanz, can i come?
my MSN list keeps saying that u sign in on a mobile device, and i don't know what that means...i'm not sure if it's u or not

DaveHill Posted: Thu Jul 8 03:58:01 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Just keep rollin' man....we're all behind you.

addi Posted: Thu Jul 8 07:15:11 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Hey chanz
good to know you can check in now and then during this rough time. Hope it doesn't last too long for you.

If you don't mind me asking what did you mean by not doing too good health wise?

Kira Posted: Thu Jul 8 12:24:04 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Hey Chanz, you chase that silver lining down the road less traveled until you get to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and then you beat it into submission with a scepter!

Thanks for saying Hi. Take care of yourself.

Asswipe Posted: Thu Jul 8 12:38:56 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  grats on getting involved in what you want to get involved in.

i'm curious what is the issue w/ your health?

mat_j Posted: Thu Jul 8 13:06:59 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Hey Brah, you know i'm there for you 100%.



Mark Posted: Thu Jul 8 13:46:46 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  nice to see you here again :) just keep going forward


Mouse Posted: Thu Jul 8 19:22:08 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Good to hear from you, congratulations on the internship and get yourself back in good health!
Life never does stop coming at you, does it? You just have to get through the times when it's bulldozing over you.
Good luck as always. :)

iggy Posted: Fri Jul 9 00:29:32 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  sorry about not being around much.
limited access to the net. and not too good goofing off in the office.

am racking my brains for ideas at the moment. which is good. takes my mind off a lot of things.

i like being behind the camera... and it's nice to be back.

healthwise. where should i start?
i believe the older gters should have read some posts in the past.

i'm suffering from a condition that affects my nerves and muscles cos it's something that affects my central nervous system. they're just deteriorating at a speed that's faster than normal people.

for a few years now, i've been going for regular treatment. well, i've not been talking about it cos there were reasons behind it. i just don't want the people around me to worry too much and just didn't like the idea of being looked upon as a sick man.

my movement is ok. but certain symptoms have affected my life and the people around me.

i've always thought i was going to be better even though i know that it is incurable.

for the past few months, my body has been rejecting the treatment esp. the medication.

symptoms which i thought were gone from my life for the past year or so resurfaced in the recent months. i didn;t take much notice to it cos i thought they were the side effects of the medication until i've gotten worried and went for a test with my doctor.

i just got my results back recently. and it confirmed my fears.

my conditon has been regressing.

i've not been talking about it to a lot of people esp the people that i love around me. i didn;t want them to worry. they have enough problems with their lives. and i thought maybe there will be a suitable treatment for me and i may be better.

fact is, i am not getting any better. .
for now, there is no other treatment.

i have an expiry date. not too soon. but it's not too long either before i end up losing my mobility.

i wish that there was a silver lining to everything. but for now... i'll like to see one.

my career is taking off, i hope... but there is a timeline to do it.

i'm sorry i kept it away from a lot of people here. but now at least u know.

i just wished that things were different sometimes. a lot of things.


iggy Posted: Fri Jul 9 05:43:11 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  i'm sorry to sound depressed and all.
it's not that. but i'm trying to deal with these things.


someone close to me told me that i must find myself. be happy, be at peace with myself.
maybe then... maybe then i may have a second chance.

i wished i told her back then or maybe even earlier the fears i was facing.

was i selfish to hide this from her?

it's not an easy thing to live with. and i don't think it'll be easy for her, considering that she may face possiblity of losing me to this damn illness.

i'm trying so hard to make peace with myself. to be happy doing something that i love. to live everyday like it was the last.

but there's this little voice in me that tells me constantly that i do not have time left.
it eats into me.

it does.

it would be good to have someone next to me. not to hold me up. not to support me.

but someone just to be next to me. just to fight another day.
so at least i know that there's a reason to go out and fight the world, fight my self, fight this damn illness.

addi Posted: Fri Jul 9 07:57:14 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Hey buddy.
Thanks for sharing all that. I understand it wasn't easy to get out.
I'm not you, so I am clueless about what you're really feeling and experiencing physically . I do hope you keep some loving, caring people in your circle. Also please keep us in that circle as often as you can, whether it's "More useless stuff" from chanz, or heavy duty emotional things on your mind.

*If you don't mind I'd like to do some reading on the illness the doc's have diagnosed you with. Pass it on here, or my email address.

Kira Posted: Sat Jul 10 01:41:06 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  I hope you find your peace.

Please fight!


iggy Posted: Sat Jul 10 03:41:29 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  neuro muscular degenration.
that's it.

thanks people.



antartica Posted: Sat Jul 10 04:00:47 2004 Post | Quote in Reply

addi Posted: Sat Jul 10 09:20:41 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  thanks for the info, chanz and ant

Nikki Posted: Sat Jul 10 09:24:41 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  good luck Chan! :-)

FN Posted: Sat Jul 10 09:29:26 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Ant, did you check out the apitherapy thing yet?

CorDrine Posted: Sat Jul 10 11:09:44 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Wow, its almost sad to read this. Somehow I gotten attached to the characters in GT. Losing anyone is gonna be like losing a friend, even though I've never met anyone before, and I hardly been keeping updated with the forum lately due to work load. Still, come to think of it, I've been visiting GT for almost 5 - 6 years now. I've read so much about the life of people here....

Hey Chanz, hang in there dude.

Mesh Posted: Sat Jul 10 23:48:24 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  stay strong chanz.

antartica Posted: Sun Jul 11 05:53:45 2004 Post | Quote in Reply  
  hey chris... have checked out some sites on it already.

also the lead from erika on Yucca...

can only do so much reading about it.

what i think i'll do is get a little more local (singapore) info on it and get some other friends back home to check it out before i get back... =)

thanks peeps...


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