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Democrat or Republican ?
ifihadahif Posted: Fri Feb 24 06:53:31 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Got this in my email this morning, thought I would share:

Subject: Democrats, Republicans, Southern Republicans and the Terrorist.

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican? Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:


SITUATION: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock Cal. 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?


_____________________________________________________________________


Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the qustion! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
_____________________________________________________________________


Republican's Answer: BANG!
_______________________________________________________________________


Southern Republican's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?
Wife: You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!



 
Mesh Posted: Fri Feb 24 08:01:41 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Shoot his kneecaps out and then take his knife and cut off his testicles. That will teach him to run at my family with a knife.



Then shove the knife up his rectum.


 
addi Posted: Fri Feb 24 11:24:30 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  what's the difference between a northern girl and a southern girl?









the northern girl says "you can"
the southern girl says "ya'll can"


: )



 
ifihadahif Posted: Fri Feb 24 13:01:22 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  addi said:
>what's the difference between a northern girl and a southern girl?
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>the northern girl says "you can"
>the southern girl says "ya'll can"
>
Only the very popular ones say that.
:-)


 
Ahriman Posted: Sat Feb 25 12:57:59 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Raise Glock and cellphone at the same time.
Speed dial lawyer and shoot gun at the same time.




 
choke Posted: Sat Feb 25 13:23:42 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Squeal like a little girl and throw the gun at him with my eyes closed :P


 
Mesh Posted: Sat Feb 25 17:15:57 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  meshuggah said:
>Shoot his kneecaps out and then take his knife and cut off his testicles. That will teach him to run at my family with a knife.
>
>
>
>Then shove the knife up his rectum.



Not really. That'z excessive and I'd go to prison no doubt. But shoot him, yes. I could probably not be convicted of anything if I just shot once.


 
Mesh Posted: Sat Feb 25 17:22:01 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  meshuggah said:
> That'z



Gross.

*That's


 
Ahriman Posted: Sun Feb 26 15:26:14 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Ahriman said:
>Raise Glock and cellphone at the same time.
>Speed dial lawyer and shoot gun at the same time.
>
>

My answer is strictly New Yorker


 
mat_j Posted: Sun Feb 26 16:18:07 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Bah guns, you don't need a gun, just headbutt the knife til it goes blunt stupid!


 
Mesh Posted: Fri Mar 3 19:14:27 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Bill O'reilly. Democrat? Republican? Or just plain blowhard douchebag?

http://www.callingallwingnuts.com/2006/03/02/bill-oreilly-first-blood/


LOL


 



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