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An Honest Conversation
sweet p Posted: Mon Jun 4 19:25:45 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  i was browsing through the myGT's and i re-found one from a long time ago that i remember liking.


**
Some days all I can think about is the need for an honest conversation. Most days it can't be had. Honest people are hard to come by, and often they're your parents, which just won't do.

So I sit and stare and think, and I figure that any minute now someone's going to appear out of the far wall, walk over, sit down and start talking to me. He must, because otherwise something bad will happen. I'll start throwing all the dishes down to shatter on the kitchen floor, or I'll climb into my car and drive into a tree. Not to hurt myself, just to vent frustration.

It's very frustrating. It's worse than trying to remember the face of the friend you met in last night's dream, worse than trying to remember the future. I watch the wall and curse the someone who isn't walking out of it, because I can feel my secrets floating up and up, to hover behind my teeth and under my tongue. I would reveal them to the first fool to say how-do. My heartbeat is the ticking of a bomb.

And all I need is someone to nod and say, "That's rough."

Bomb diffused.

**


it's true.and i understand it.


everyday at work, i'm asked "how are you?" by dozens of people and they always seem surprised when i say more than "good thanks, you?" as they walk away.
i don't care that they don't care about me, i just wish they'd ask the question seriously if they're going to ask at all.

i've been a regular lurker on GT these days but i thought i'd pop out for a bit and see how things are going with you besides what i see.

how are you?
if you want to tell me.


 
sweet p Posted: Mon Jun 4 19:27:12 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  * ps. not my MyGT article


 
CorDrine Posted: Tue Jun 5 00:59:34 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  yeah, i feel you. Honest ppl who can talk honestly are hard to come by. If you have such friends. Treasure them!
If you need someone to talk me, feel free to look for me if I am online :)
msn: mmiserva@yahoo.com



 
Posted: Tue Jun 5 02:21:33 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  sweet p said:
>how are you?

I am well enough :)

back in sunny Canada now. Drove out to the desert while I was in Phoenix and communed with nature and talked to Jim Morrison and a naked indian. it was all in good fun.

My dog, max, has gone quite deaf. It's sort of sad, but at least he isn't terrified by thunderstorms anymore. When the rain started pouring this afternoon, we went through our regular ritual of sitting on the front porch and eating unhealthy food and watching the rain come down.

It's nice. He's a very old friend.


 
beetlebum Posted: Tue Jun 5 05:39:50 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  i'm great.

i just finished my finals; i never have to sit another exam again. i can't explain how it is here; suffice it to say that finishing exams is a big deal- i got flowers yesterday from many an admirer and drank pimms and bollinger while sitting next to the river with good friends and shooting the shit.

today i was going to go to london, but it looks as though it may rain, so the group consensus was that we shouldn't go, so instead i'm going around to all of the colleges to take some photos with some friends because it won't be such a pain if it starts raining here. and then i'm going out to see spiderman 3. ihaven't seen a film in the theatres in AGES. then i'm going out with friends to a club.

tomorrow i'm going strawberry picking and then to the pub and then back here for strawberries with chocolate fondue, and then a birthday party.


those are how my days will be for the next few weeks. then i'm travelling to the canary islands and the riviera, then back to the states to go on holiday with the fam.

seriously, i am so glad i'm finished with university. it has been such a long time in the making. i also look forward to moving back to the united states permanently. <3


 
~Just Imagine~ Posted: Tue Jun 5 15:32:24 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Who wrote it ?

I haven't read anything so true lately...

Thanks for sharing it !
It's really nice to read, and so understandeble

How I need to have honest people around me, people that share, that want to know, the ones that mean what they say, and say what they feel...
The ones you can tell your secrets, and tell you theirs ...
People like that are hard to find, but if you find the few who are, you have to treasure them, and never let em go...

Especially the ones you love, you need them to open up, and really let you in, not half, but all the way...
And let them in with you at the same way


 
sweet p Posted: Tue Jun 5 21:40:18 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  CorDrine said:
>yeah, i feel you. Honest ppl who can talk honestly are hard to come by. If you have such friends. Treasure them!
>If you need someone to talk me, feel free to look for me if I am online :)
>msn: mmiserva@yahoo.com

thanks Cor, that's real nice of ya.
:)


CriminalSaint said:
>back in sunny Canada now.
except today wasn't sunny AT ALL. !

>It's nice. He's a very old friend.
he's also cute. how far is phoenix from toronto? close enough to come and play wii??

beetlebum said:
>today i was going to go to london
one of my high school friends is in london right now. she invited me to come with her - i really should've.
i heard spiderman 3 is shit. and that mjane sings. heh. today i had a million raspberries. i LOVE raspberries.
and CONGRATS [!!] on being done. that's amazing.

~Just Imagine~ said:
>Who wrote it ?
our Kira wrote it.
>the ones that mean what they say, and say what they feel...
thye're the best kind.


hm. i miss kira.




 
Kira Posted: Tue Jun 5 22:51:16 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Wow. Total mind-blow.

:D

I miss you too, P. And everyone. I've been mostly working and sleeping. And you know... you learn that no matter how busy and distracted you are, you never stop longing for a confidant.

How are you, sweetest-P? You should have seen the double-take I did when I saw this thread, you would have cracked up.



 
Ahriman Posted: Wed Jun 6 02:07:12 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  I had a shitty day at work. Few new burns, few new bruises, but what made it really craptacular was gravity and momentum.

They needed a madeira sauce on the fly and I was in the middle of making a million other things. I dropped what I was doing to throw the sauce together as fast as possible. Running to get all the ingredients in. The chablis, the canola oil, the madeira reduction, the shallots....shit....I have no minced shallots. Checking the clock. I had no time to start mincing shallots so I start for the saute cooks because I knew they had some. Like a wild jack rabbit, I'm running out of the kitchen towards the line and as I round the corner past the dish room I feel it. The grease and water sitting there on the ground just for me. My feet flew up and I flew down. My body took it hard. Stars all over. I lay for one second telling myself to get up. Pulling my shattered self together, I make it to the shallots and back to to my production. Once done, I grab a 1/6 pan and pour the sauce in and run it to the saute cooks. I put down the steaming hot red madeira and exhale. The saute cook looks at me and says "I needed lemon sauce too."
....
So I limped back and kept doing what I do. :(


 
FN Posted: Wed Jun 6 04:27:53 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  I'm in a rather unpleasant mood.

Exams suck, and not in the good way.


 
Mark Posted: Wed Jun 6 11:32:05 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Honesty isn’t always appreciated. Some advice, never ask anyone’s opinion unless you are willing to hear that which you actually didn’t want to hear… or something like that.

Anyway, having somebody honest to talk to from time to time is indeed something to treasure :)

Past year had far more downs than it had ups and I had to take some time of from my education to handle it all… It is getting better lately, but taking that final step to continue my education is hard. I will be able to finish though, I positive :)

I need to get back here more often… I need to respond in my own thread I started a while ago :p


 
Cherry_Moon Posted: Wed Jun 6 11:51:09 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  i'm exhausted from working two jobs. bleh. Puck, Mousie, and I are all living together now. Moving things are a mofo bitch... i'm broke as hell paying bills on the last date possible... :P but things are looking up i think *knocks on wood*

I get asked how am i and when at the end of the night i reply "i'm alright, i'm tired but i'm about to go home." some times i get the nod of understanding. and sometimes, i'll get a shocked look. as though i wasn't suppose to be tired of working 8 1/2-9 hour shifts standing up.


 
Ahriman Posted: Thu Jun 7 02:38:56 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  cherry, where do you work? I just worked a 12 hour. No breaks. No sitting. Plenty of yelling and plenty of burns. They have me scheduled 10 days in a row right now and I'm on day six. bleeeeh.


 
Cherry_Moon Posted: Thu Jun 7 14:26:44 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  sounds like a sucky job. and i wouldn't do that sort of work...


i work at an organic grocery store. i work in the deli full time.

i am sure you get great money for what you do but i am not willing to have my body totally messed up for a few extra dollars an hour.

I'm just trying to save a little and hang out and wait and until my 22nd birthday rolls about.

trucking companies won't hire people under 21/22. Then me and Puck will be trucking for probably a decade. Saving up money for our house. And spending our weekends off in KS with his folks in the guest house.

All I need is Puck and our little corgi by my side to call it home.

My family and I just don't care for each other so I won't miss them and I don't they'll think of me. *shrugs*


 
kurohyou Posted: Thu Jun 7 16:38:39 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  I just finished my first week of field Training and have learned valuable lessons...

Geography of a particular area is harder to learn in the dark, espeicially the dark that is about at 0300am...

and A bullet proof ves, while a necessary element of my new profession is one of the most uncomforatable things I have ever had to wear...

Right now I'm tired and going to try to crash...

Not that it matters...


 
sweet p Posted: Thu Jun 7 23:15:45 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Kira said:
>How are you, sweetest-P? You should have seen the double-take I did when I saw this thread, you would have cracked up.

:) :)
i'm a-okay. i've been really concentrated on work. not my actual work at work, but the place and people in general. the woman i sit nearest to has become a good friend of mine and i didn't realise until today. i recently gave in my 3 weeks notice and was called in by three different people for different meetings to discuss raises/promotions. they don't want me to leave and it's hard for me to reject them again and again. i'm going to miss all of these little things i didn't really think about until today. i don't like when that happens.

Ahriman said:
>I make it to the shallots
at least you made it to the shallots! heh. hope you had a better day today. funny you mention shallots, cos my friend at work made me a delicious lunch and there were shallots in the salad. i've never referred to them as such. i just thought they were "small onions".

Christophe said:
>I'm in a rather unpleasant mood.
heya christophe, i saw "you" at the football game on the weekend. you were handing out pamphlets that nobody wanted to read after sittin in the sun for 3 hours. i was staring at this random dude for 10 minutes trying to figure out how i knew him and then i realised i didn't know him at all and that he just closely resemebled my friend from the internet who i've never met. hah.

Mark said:
>It is getting better lately, but taking that final step to continue my education is hard.
i hear ya. i've done the same. but i'm also in no rush. i've taken a million different courses and also worked a few different jobs and i'm slowly getting a feel of what i really want to do with my self. it'll probably change in a year, but oh well. it IS hard to finally set foot on the path you want to be on. but i think you can do it if you want it. good luck, mark!

Cherry_Moon said:
>as though i wasn't suppose to be tired of working 8 1/2-9 hour shifts standing up.
blarrrrgh. working two jobs is damn tough.
hope things really are looking up. say hi to puck and mousiiiie!!

[people think of you, cherry.]

kurohyou said:
> just finished my first week of field Training and have learned valuable lessons

cool. i'd never want to wear a bullet proof vest though. hope the rest of your training goes well!




 
jennemmer Posted: Wed Jun 13 03:02:18 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  I am really, really tired but in that good sort of way. We have been pulling off what is close to a miracle at work. We have done in 2 and a half weeks what most groups wouldn't be brave enough to try in a month. The fact that we have almost pulled it off with a few days left to go is extremely satisfying... though it has been at the expense of almost all free time and a good portion of sleep. But there are lots of people around all working together and some people who haven't been around in a while who dropped by to help so it's been a social sort of event in it's way and so has even been a fair bit of fun.

I'm glad to see that most people here seem to be doing well... It's nice to check in every now and again and do the internet equivalent to seeing familiar faces.


 
FN Posted: Wed Jun 13 04:11:14 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  sweet p said:
>Christophe said:
>>I'm in a rather unpleasant mood.
>heya christophe, i saw "you" at the football game on the weekend. you were handing out pamphlets that nobody wanted to read after sittin in the sun for 3 hours. i was staring at this random dude for 10 minutes trying to figure out how i knew him and then i realised i didn't know him at all and that he just closely resemebled my friend from the internet who i've never met. hah.

Haha

I always figured you saw me as a bit more glorious in nature, instead of a pamphlet dealer.

Oh the damage to my ego! The merciless damage!

However, did he look like you'd take him home with you and ask your mother if you could keep him?


 
sweet p Posted: Mon Jul 2 23:29:16 2007 Post | Quote in Reply  
  jennemmer said:
>I'm glad to see that most people here seem to be doing well... It's nice to check in every now and again and do the internet equivalent to seeing familiar faces.

yeah, nice to hear from you jenn. i was beginning to wonder!

Christophe said:
>However, did he look like you'd take him home with you and ask your mother if you could keep him?

well i'll admit i walked back for a better look. haha
upon closer inspection, he was more like jailbait-christophe. so..no comment.





 



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