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  • T'was the Night Before Christmas
    19 Dec 2003

    T'was the night before Christmas, when all through the house
    Not a GTer was stirring, not even young mouse;
    The thongs were hung by the chimney with care,
    In hopes that some plinkers soon would be there;

    Chanz was nestled all snug in his bed,
    While visions of dead liberals played in hif’s head;
    And Ant with a half pint, spilled schnapps on his lap,
    Had just blacked out for a long winter's nap,

    When out by the hot tub there arose such a clatter,
    Jazer sprang from the toilet, making sure not to splatter.
    Aeon flew to the window, with mat_j close behind,
    dan632 opened the shutters, a sight they did they find!

    The moon cast its glow on the new-fallen snow
    Gave the luster of females to the objects below.
    When, what to our wandering hands should appear,
    But a Benz limousine full of plinkers, Oh Cheer!

    With a driver so nimble, so lively he hastened,
    We knew in a moment it must be St. Jason.
    More rapid than Christophe in a brothel they came,
    And we whistled, and shouted, and howled by name!

    "Now Sweet P! now, Dancer! now, bluellama and Sailovzi!
    On, misszero! On, SntSaturn!, on marsi and socialy D!
    From the top of our lungs! to these vixens we call!
    Come to us! Come to us! Come to us all!"

    As dry tongues that before cool water do sip,
    We waited and watched, with drool on lip.
    Then up towards the house came the plinkers in pair,
    With a gleam in their eyes, and one with red hair!

    And then, all together, we in reverence did kneel
    And said a prayer for the joy in our hearts we did feel.
    As Malik said his “Amen!”, we all heard the loud sound,
    Down the front steps our presents came with a bound.

    m*a*s* was dressed in bright feathers, from her head to her toe,
    And Libra’s clothes were silver tinsel, with a small tiny bow.
    A bundle of goodies St. Jason had flung on his back,
    And he looked like a drug peddler, opening his pack.

    Choke’s eyes-how they twinkled! Her nipples so merry!
    Seeing cheeks like pink bubbles, that would pop like a cherry!
    Novrain’s festive tatoo’s were done by a pro,
    And jennemmer’s virginal dress was as white as the snow.

    The stump of a pipe was passed teeth to teeth,
    And the smoke it encircled our minds like a wreath.
    Koff had a broad face and a little pot belly,
    That shook when he cussed, like a bowlful of jelly!

    He was grumpy and crude, a right hateful young elf,
    And we laughed when we heard him, in spite of ourself!
    A wink from an eye when nothing was said,
    Soon led us to know that we might go to bed.

    We spoke not a word, as we turned off our phones,
    Then filled all their stockings, with sweat and low moans.
    Then St. Jason laid his finger aside of his nose,
    And giving a nod, up the staircase they rose!

    He sprang to the limo, to his girls gave a whistle,
    And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
    But I heard him exclaim, as he waved with delight,
    "Happy Christmas to all plonkers, and to all plinkers good-night!"

    Has to make a slight change to this one. I origonally had Choke down as a guy