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  • The Story Of George
    George [Em] Crouser
    13 Nov 2002

    So many things to say... and yet... there are no words...
    Try as I might, I will never reach the destination everyone has told me to aim for.
    Though you've all bent me, broken me, chained me...
    I will never be molded into what you all wanted me to be.
    I see the questions you dare not ask revealed in your decieving eyes...
    I'm not stupid...
    I'm not blind...
    "Why does she have to be that way?"
    "Why is she always so depressing?"
    "Why won't she..."
    "Why can't she..."
    "Why doesn't she..."
    I have my reasons... and there are far more reasons than I will EVER reveal...
    Some of you may think you know...
    Those of you who say you can love me because you think you understand...
    Because you know what I'm feeling...
    Think again...
    You will never know what I am feeling...
    You will never know who I am or what I have seen because I will not let you see...
    I will not haunt you as I have been haunted...
    Every night of my life...
    Screaming...
    Cold sweat...
    Forced to watch what no one should ever have to see...
    My story is a secret.
    My life, a hidden and unholy existance...
    A vile thing which is hidden from the light, for fear that it should infect those who look upon it with some incurable sadness...
    A sadness like mine...
    The darkness in which I found refuge for so long has since become my prison.
    With fear and pain and my own two hands, I built its walls tall and insurmountable...
    Strong they were built and strong they stand...
    I am held captive by my own self...
    An insignificant prisoner of the war that rages on unfailing inside...
    Now I am left cold and dark... staring blindly out into the measureless sky...

    My baby dahl George-Em wrote this. Yes,SHE is a WOMAN.