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  • poem the first
    4 Dec 2002

    I've seen my heroes die and my world crumbled down
    I watched my so-called god cry and I saw angels frown
    I felt what hell was like and it felt too much like home
    My body descends on a rusty spike and finally it's alone
    I felt happiness in my pain and myriad love in my hate
    I hated faces that I couldn't name and flavors I couldn't taste

    I know pain all too well and took it as my own
    I know my home as hell and I am happy when I'm alone
    I always see you smiling and that's a life that I can't live
    Life is filled with dumb emotion and gifts that I can't give
    It's filled with pity and love and lessons I'll never learn
    Because I sat idly by and died and watched my halo burn

    I let my heroes die and tore my own world down
    I made my so-called god sigh and in my tears I drowned
    I loved my home too much and had to call it hell
    I didn't love my life enough and, in flames, I fell
    I confused love with hate and thought all good should die
    I met my own retched fate and I couldn't live a lie…