THE X-FILES
Theef (7x14)

written by Vince Gilligan, John Shiban, and Frank Spotnitz


episodes

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Fight The Future

MULDER: What do you think, Scully, is this a name, possibly? Or a code, or an anagram?

SCULLY: "T-h-e-e-f." I assume it's supposed to be t-h-i-e-f-- "thief."

MULDER: Insert your own Dan Quayle joke here.


MULDER: Lousy spelling aside, what do you think it refers to? Who's the thief?

SCULLY: Well, that's certainly one question. I've got many.

MULDER: "Mulder, why are we here?"

SCULLY: To be fair, I might have used the words "Mulder, how is this an X-File?"

MULDER: You see that, Scully, you always keep me guessing.


DR. WIEDER: If I have any enemies I don't know them.


MULDER: Hey, Scully.

SCULLY: Uh-huh.

MULDER: This dirt we found? Gas chromatograph shows pronounced spikes of methane and sulfur compounds-- the signature of decay. It's graveyard dirt. Also known as conjure dust. It's one of the most powerful hexing elements whether for good or evil, not the kind of stuff you want to be on the wrong end of.

SCULLY: Uh-huh.

MULDER: Go ahead, Scully, keep me guessing.

SCULLY: Kuru.

MULDER: The, the, the, uh... the disease that New Guinea tribesmen get?

SCULLY: From eating the brains of their relatives.

MULDER: And I thought my grandpa slurping his soup was bad.

SCULLY: Practically speaking, Mulder, Kuru doesn't even exist anymore. Not in New Guinea and certainly not in the U.S. But this man's cerebellum and his striatum clearly show signs of it, Mulder. I mean, these... these amyloid plaques? His brain is riddled with them.

MULDER: Kuru makes you crazy, right?

SCULLY: Yeah, stark raving, among other things but in this case, stark raving mad enough to slit his own throat and hang himself. Mulder, that's what his autopsy shows. From the wound pattern to the blood spray... this man did it to himself, there's no question.

MULDER: Unless... it was inflicted upon him. The graveyard dirt, the hex. He was given this disease so that he would kill himself.


MULDER: The dirt you found in your bed drawn in the shape of a body. That's indicative of folk magic. That's what I believe is being used against you.

DR. WIEDER: Folk magic. You mean like Baba Yaga... Gypsies.

MULDER: I was actually thinking less Eastern and more Celtic. Maybe... Scots-Irish or Appalachian, even.

DR. WIEDER: I'm supposed to take this seriously?


PROPRIETER: Whoa, Chief... back in your pocket.

SCULLY: It's dirt.

PROPRIETER: It's goofer dust is what it is. I don't know what your intentions are with that.

SCULLY: Goofer dust?

MULDER: Conjure dust... Goofer dust. How would you go about making somebody sick using that? We're investigating a murder. That's why I'm asking.

PROPRIETER: Oh... Speaking strictly in the academic sense you'd spread it on or near your victim to direct misfortune.

MULDER: So you could give them any illness you wanted? One that you chose specifically for them?

PROPRIETER: Oh... that's a lot trickier. It requires something special.

SCULLY: A voodoo doll.

PROPRIETER: No, they're called "poppets". Inside you place three thorns of a blood red rose, a strand of hair and a photo of your victim. Maybe other items as well. It depends on the operator. You sew it up, say your spell.

MULDER: How would you counteract one of these?

PROPRIETER: It depends on who you're dealing with. But if the person you're looking for is powerful enough to bring about a murder he's probably charmed.

SCULLY: Which would mean what?

PROPRIETER: It means just that. He's drawing on the energy of a charm. A source of magic power... It could be any item provided that it's very important to him. Something that holds great meaning for him and unless you can separate him from his charm, you're out of luck.


PEATTIE: Radiation... comes from the heart of the atom. I think it be God's own glow.


SCULLY: If Lynette Peattie was Carlos the Jackal I would've had an easier time tracking her down. There's no birth certificate, no social security number, nothing.

MULDER: Better known to the world as "Jane Doe 6149."



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taken from the X-Files transcript by CarriKendl - CarriKendl@aol.com