Handy Ruminations for PTA Meetings

Terman's Law:
          There is no direct relationship between the quality of an educational program and its cost.

Campbell's Travelling-with-the-Kids Law:
          It's better to go when you have to go - than to go and find you've already gone.

Hendrickson's Law:
          If a problem causes many meetings, the meetings eventually become more important than the problem.

The George Washington Cherry Tree Theory of Truth and Consequences:
          You can get away with anything as long as you tell someone about it.

Mark Twain's Observation:
          Adam was but human - this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple's sake, he wanted it because it was forbidden.

Saul Lavisky's Observation:
          Education is what you get from reading the small print. Experience is what you get from not reading it.

Rahilly's Law of Academic Administration:
          Remember that not all the faculty have all their faculties.

Haap's Rule:
          Don't ever let an alligator mouth overload a hummingbird rear end.

Papa Rich's Conclusion:
          Whatever a parent does is wrong.

Kavannaugh's Maxim:
          Necessity never made a good bargain.

Zaenglein's Postulate:
          Kids used to ask you where they came from - now they tell you where to go.

Rodney's Rule:
          Never let your studies interfere with your education.

McFadden's Observation:
          The trouble with experience as a teacher is that the test comes first and the lesson afterward.

The First Afghan Law of Education:
          No amount of poor schooling can spoil a good student.

Sanders' Rumination:
          Life is a game, the object of which is to discover the object of the game.

Cornuelle's Law:
          Authority tends to assign jobs to those least able to do them.

Clint's Cure-All:
          When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout!

Mullin's Observation:
          Indecision is the key to inflexibility.

Father Brennan's Famous Footnote:
          Children should be heard, not obscene.

Baird's Rumination:
          The brilliant person who invented peanut butter can't be all that great.

Napier's Cogent Comment:
          Old people know more about being young then young people about being old.

Hecker's Law:
          If you do your lessons every day, you never have to worry about a test.

Boxer's Law:
          A person who minces his words usually chokes on them.

Mrs. Bowman's Law of Sibling Rivalry:
          The child who cuts the piece of candy in half doesn't get first choice of the two pieces.

Engle's Law:
          Don't ever stand up to be counted or someone will take your seat.

Preston's Postulate:
          He who trains his tongue to quote the learned sages will be known far and wide as a smart-ass.

Jimenez's Maxim:
          If they give you ruled paper, write the other way.

An Educational Guess:
          The founder of the school of hard knocks bruised easily.

Spence's Observation:
          One doesn't have to be handicapped to get a good education, but it certainly helps.

Shultz's Sage Thought:
          If you don't have a memory like an elephant, leave tracks like one.

Parker's Rule of Parliamentary Procedure:
          A motion to adjourn is always in order.

Grandma Soderquist's Observation:
          Rememebr on your walk through life, the grass made greener on the other side of the fence is caused by "pasture pies."

Sousa's Principle of Lecture:
          If you can't baffle them with brilliance, befuddle them with bullshit.

Talamantez's Gripe:
          You don't discover life is more than a bowl of cherries till after you've eaten them.

Groya's Law:
          What we learn after we know it all, is what counts.

Dr. Levitan's Rule:
          It if smells bad and is sticky, it will eventually find its way onto your children or your shoes.

Furst's Academic Axiom:
          He who controls the purse strings controls the educational policy.

Utvich's Observation:
          Education is the process of moving from cocksure ignorance to thoughtsul uncertainty.

B. V. Roy's Conclusion:
          Teaching is the fine art of imparting knowledge without possessing it.

Bergman's Bromide:
          Today's life-style is such that no matter how much money you make, you'll still eat hamburger (in some form) four times a week.

Goldstein's Truism:
          Success means only doing what you do well, letting someone else do the rest.

Oscar Mayer's Creed:
          No matter how many hot dogs you consume at home, they always taste better at the ball park.

[ BACK ]


designed by Generation Terrorists Designs & Concepts