GENERAL GREY: Looks like a big turd.
COMMANDING OFFICER: We estimate it has a diameter of over five hundred and fifty kilometers and a mass roughly one fourth the size of our moon.
GENERAL GREY: A meteor?
SECOND OFFICER: No Sir. Definitely not.
GENERAL GREY: How do you know?
SECOND OFFICER: Well, er... it's slowing down.
GENERAL GREY: It's doing what?
SECOND OFFICER: It's... slowing down, Sir.
WHITMORE: Hi honey. What time is it there?
MARGARET: Two in the morning. I know I didn't wake you?
WHITMORE: As a matter of fact you did.
WHITMORE: I have a confession to make. There's a beautiful young blonde sleeping next to me.
PATRICIA: Daddy let me watch Letterman.
DAVID: Checkmate. See you tomorrow, Dad.
MOISHE: That's not checkmate I can still... Oh. You could let an old man win once in a while, it wouldn't kill you.
AIDE #2: NASA has been up my butt all morning. They want to know our position.
CONSTANCE: Our official position is we don't have an official position.
COMMANDING OFFICER: Our intelligence tells us the object has settled into a stationary orbit.
NIMZIKI: Well that's good news.
COMMANDING OFFICER: Not really. Part of it has broken off into nearly three dozen other pieces.
PRESIDENT WHITMORE: Pieces?
COMMANDING OFFICER: Smaller than the whole, yet over fifteen miles in width themselves.
NIMZIKI: Where are they heading?
COMMANDING OFFICER: They should be entering our atmosphere within the next twenty-five minutes.
MIGUEL: Just what the hell do you think you're doing?
RUSSELL: I'm bringing home the bacon. Earning my keep. And doing a fine job if I do say so myself.
MIGUEL: It's the wrong field, you idiot! Lucas' farm is on the other side of town.
MECHANIC #1: Hey, Russ, when they took you up in their space ship, they do any sexual things to you?
PRESIDENT WHITMORE: Of course, Russia and the United States are in this together. Yes, Mr. President, you have my word. Yes, Das Vedanya.
CONSTANCE: What is their position?
PRESIDENT WHITMORE: I think he was drunk.
DAVID: Remember I told you that the signal hidden within our satellite signal is slowly recycling down to extinction.
MARTY: Not really...
DAVID: That signal. It's a countdown.
MARTY: A countdown to what?
DAVID: Think. It's like in chess. First you strategically position your pieces. Then, when the timing's right. You strike. They are positioning themselves all over the world and using this one signal to synchronize their efforts. In approximately six hours the signal will disappear and the countdown will be over.
MARTY: Then what?
MARTY: I gotta call my brother, my bookie, my lawyer... fuck my lawyer...
PRESIDENT WHITMORE: My fellow Americans, a historic and unprecedented event has taken place. The question as to whether or not we are alone in the universe has been answered...
STEVE: Look, after your shift tonight, why don't you grab Dylan and come stay with me on base.
JASMINE: Really? You don't mind?
STEVE: Naw. I'll just tell my other girlfriends they can't come over tonight.
JASMINE: You know, you're not as charming as you think you are.
STEVE: Yes, I am.
MOISHE: It's the White House, for crying out loud. You can't just drive up and ring the bell.
DAVID: Can't this thing go any faster?
MOISHE: You think they don't know what you know? Believe me, they know. She works for the President. They know everything.
DAVID: They don't know this.
MOISHE: And you're going to educate them? Tell me something, you're so smart how come you spent eight years at M.I.T. to become a cable repairman?
MOISHE: All I'm saying is they've got people who handle these things, David. They want HBO, they'll call you.
REPORTER: ...a local crop duster was arrested today attempting to land at Edwards Air Force Base...
MOISHE: The whole world is trying to get out of Washington and we're the only schmucks trying to get in.
JIMMY: I don't believe it. They make you learn how to fly everything from an Apache to a Harrier and still they turn you down? What else do they want you to learn?
STEVE: How to kiss ass.
MOISHE: So, you want to ring the bell or should I?
DAVID: Perfect, she's using it.
MOISHE: It's perfect the line is busy?
DAVID: Yes. I can use the signal to triangulate her exact position in the White House.
MOISHE: You can do that?
DAVID: All cable repairmen can.
CONSTANCE: What do you want me to do?
DAVID: I want you to leave with us. Right now.
CONSTANCE: I can't leave. We have to tell this to the President.
DAVID: He's not going to listen to me.
MOISHE: Sure he'll listen. Why wouldn't he?
DAVID: Because last time I saw him I punched him in the face.
MOISHE: You punched the President in the face?
DAVID: He wasn't the President then.
CONSTANCE: David thought I was having an affair, which I wasn't.
MOISHE: Punched the President? Oh my god.
WATSON: You will be the first wave in our counter attack. Though surveillance satellite reconnaissance has been impaired, we have a fix on our primary target.
STEVE: You won't exactly need radar to find it.
WATSON: You want to add something to this briefing, Lt. Hill?
STEVE: Sorry, Sir. Just real anxious to kick some alien ass.
MOISHE: All he could think about was getting to you. There's still love there I think.
CONSTANCE: Love was never our problem.
MOISHE: All you need is love. John Lennon. Smart man. Shot in the back, very sad.
NIMZIKI: I spoke with the Joint Chief when they arrived at NORAD. They agree, we must launch a counter offensive with a full nuclear strike. Hit 'em with everything we've got.
PRESIDENT: Above American soil?
NIMZIKI: If we don't strike soon, there may not be much of an America left to defend.
MOISHE: Don't tell him to shut up! You'd all be dead, were it not for my David. You didn't do anything to prevent this!
PRESIDENT: Sir, there wasn't much more we could have done. We were totally unprepared for this.
MOISHE: Don't give me unprepared! Since nineteen fifty whatever you guys have had that space ship, the thing you found in New Mexico.
DAVID: Dad, please...
MOISHE: What was it, Roswell? You had the space ship, the bodies, everything locked up in a bunker, the what is it, Area fifty one. That's it! Area fifty one. You knew and you didn't do nothing!
PRESIDENT: Regardless of what the tabloids have said, there were never any space crafts recovered by the government. Take my word for it, there is no Area 51 and no recovered space ship.
NIMZIKI: Uh, excuse me, Mr. President, but that's not entirely accurate.
MIGUEL: Need a lift?
STEVE: When I flew overhead, I saw some kind of base, not far.
MIGUEL: It's not on the map.
STEVE: Trust me, it's there.
PRESIDENT: Why the hell wasn't I told about this place?
NIMZIKI: Two words, Mr. President. Plausible deniability.
OKUN: She's a beaut, ain't she?
MOISHE: Never any space ships recovered by the government, huh?
PRESIDENT: We've had this for forty years and you don't know anything about them?
OKUN: Hell no, we know tons about them. The neatest stuff has only happened in the last few days. See, we can't duplicate their type of power so we've never been able to experiment. But since these guys started showing up, all the gizmos inside turned on.
PRESIDENT: What can you tell us about the enemy we're facing?
OKUN: Not all too dissimilar to us. Breathes oxygen, comparable tolerances to heat, cold... probably why they're interested in our planet. Hey, you wanna see them?
OKUN: This is vault, or as some of us have come to call it, the "freak show." When we found them they were wearing bio-mechanical suits. Once we got them off, we were able to learn a great deal about their anatomy; eyes, ears, bipolar digestive system... no vocal cords though. We're assuming they communicate with each other through other means.
DAVID: What kind of other means? Hand signals, body language?
OKUN: Some kind of extra sensory perception. Telepathy.
PRESIDENT: Can they be killed?
OKUN: These three died in the crash. Their bodies are as frail as our own. You just have to get past their technology, which is, I'm sorry to say, far more advanced.
GENERAL GREY: We've learned that NATO and western allied installations were the first to be taken out. We were next. They knew exactly where and how to hit us.
PRESIDENT: And our forces?
GENERAL GREY: We're down to approximately fifteen percent, Sir. If you calculate the time it takes them to destroy a city and move on, we're looking at world wide destruction of every major city within the next thirty six hours.
PRESIDENT: We're being exterminated.
MARGARET: So, what do yo do for a living?
JASMINE: I'm a dancer.
MARGARET: Really? Ballet?
JASMINE: No. Exotic.
MARGARET: Oh. Sorry.
JASMINE: Don't be. I'm not. It's good money. 'Side, he's worth it.
MARGARET: And when the dancing's over? What about your future?
JASMINE: Funny, it used to scare me when I thought about the future. Guess it doesn't really matter anymore.
JASMINE: Dylan, come here. I want you to meet the First Lady.
MARGARET: I thought you didn't recognize me.
JASMINE: Didn't want to say anything. I voted for the other guy.
PRESIDENT: Why did you people come here?
OKUN/ALIEN: Air... water... your "sun."
PRESIDENT: Where do your people come from? Where is your home?
OKUN/ALIEN: Here... now.
PRESIDENT: And before here?
OKUN/ALIEN: Many worlds...
PRESIDENT: Can we negotiate a truce? Is there room for co-existance? Can there be peace between us?
OKUN/ALIEN: Peace? No peace.
PRESIDENT: What do you want us to do?
TECHNICIAN #1: Target is locked, sir. Do you wish to deploy?
GENERAL GREY: Mr. President, do you wish to deploy.
NIMZIKI: Mr. President?
PILOT: She's away.
PRESIDENT: May our children forgive us.
MOISHE: David, David! What the hell are you doing!?
DAVID: I'm making a mess.
MOISHE: This I can see.
DAVID: We've gotta burn the rain forest, Pops. Dump toxic waste, pollute the air, rip up the ozone. Maybe if we screw this planet up enough they won't want it anymore.
NIMZIKI: I understand that you're upset over the death of your wife but that's no excuse for making another fatal mistake...
PRESIDENT: The only mistake I made was appointing a sniveling little weasel like you Chief of Staff. But this is a mistake, I am thankful to say, I do not have to live with. Mr. Nimziki, you're fired.
PRESIDENT: Good morning. In less than one hour planes from here and all around the world will launch the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind... Mankind. The word has new meaning for all of us now. We are reminded not of our petty differences but of our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today, July the Fourth, we will once again fight for our freedom. Not from tyranny, persecution or oppression. But from annihilation. We're fighting for our right to live, to exit. From this day on, the fourth day of July will no longer be remembered as an American holiday but as the day that all of mankind declared we will not go quietly into the night. We will not vanish without a fight. We will live on. We will survive.