JIMMY: I was on the Internet last night. You know, just killing time. In the privacy of my own home. I don't know what I was thinking.

BOBBY: Jimmy.

JIMMY: I clicked onto a web page. It was about hidden cameras. I figured, what the heck.

BOBBY: What, you saw some girly pictures?

JIMMY: Videos. And not just any girly videos. Lucy was in them.

BOBBY: Lucy? Our Lucy?

JIMMY: Yeah.

BOBBY: I don't think I can ever look at her the same again.

JIMMY: I know I can't.

BOBBY: Look at this. There's a VCR up here too. Must be on some kind of timer. We should just leave it as is and show it to the police. In the meantime, is there another place that you could stay? Lucy?

LUCY: What?

BOBBY: Is there some place else you could stay?

LUCY: Yeah. With my dad.

BOBBY: And you have no idea who could be doing this?

LUCY: No.

BOBBY: Okay. Look, I know you don't want anybody else to find out, but I'd like to bring in Eugene, Lindsay -

LUCY: No.

BOBBY: Lucy -

LUCY: I don't want them all to know, Bobby.

BOBBY: It'll stay within the firm. Lindsay's pretty up to speed on computers, and I'll need Eugene to knock on some doors. Let us help you.

LUCY: You don't have to watch it, Lindsay.

LINDSAY: No, I'm just trying to find out how many web sites it's been uploaded onto.

LUCY: You mean, that there's more?

LINDSAY: I'm afraid you're pretty popular.

LUCY: How many times did you watch it, Jimmy?

JIMMY: Not too many.

LINDSAY: Oh, my god...

LUCY: Now what?

LINDSAY: It isn't you, it's Jimmy.

JIMMY: What?

LINDSAY: I just tapped into the Boston Buff web site to see if we were listed, but, damn, I lost it.

EUGENE: What's Boston Buff?

LINDSAY: The Boston Buff Society. Court buffs. They're basically retired people who follow trials, and they rank lawyers. Here it is. Seems like they're into gossip now.

LINDSAY: "Attorney James Berluti has been making a little chamber music with Judge Roberta Kittleson."

JIMMY: What? That's ridiculous! That's, that's trick photography!

BOBBY: Jimmy, in my office.

BOBBY: You're sleeping with her!

JIMMY: It's my own private life!

BOBBY: Not anymore, it's on the Internet. Jimmy, she's a client.

JIMMY: Was a client. It started after her case ­

BOBBY: She's also a whacko. Did you know that?

JIMMY: She's not a whacko.

BOBBY: Jimmy, she is.

JIMMY: She's a great judge. One affair with a clerk doesn't make her ­

BOBBY: She pulled me into chambers and told me she was having erotic dreams about me.

JIMMY: What?

BOBBY: Yes. While I was in trial with her she calls me into chambers and tells me she's having sexual fantasies about me. Then she hit on me. Jimmy, she has OCD. Oral compulsive disorder?

JIMMY: Look. I don't know with you. But me and her, we're consenting adults. We're… consenting adults!!!

JUDGE KITTLESON: Don't you dare just barge in on me like this.

JIMMY: Just tell me. Yes or no.

JUDGE KITTLESON: To which question? Did I have a dream about Bobby? Yes. So what?

JIMMY: What about the other… How many lawyers have you been with?

JUDGE KITTLESON: That is certainly none of your business. You wanna tell me how many women you've been with?

JIMMY: You heard of the Boston Court Buffs?

JUDGE KITTLESON: Of course I've heard of them. They fill half the room sometimes.

JIMMY: Well, they got a web site. With a program. It talks about you and me. It's got a picture of you and me on the elevator. It also has head shots of all the other lawyers you've been with, they say, sexually.

JUDGE KITTLESON: What do you mean, it's got a picture?

JIMMY: There must be some security camera on the elevator. How they got access who knows, but ­

JUDGE KITTLESON: There's a picture of you and me?

JIMMY: Kissing. And there's pictures of other lawyers. Just head shots, but it says you've been with them.

JUDGE KITTLESON: This is on the Internet?

JIMMY: Yeah.

JUDGE KITTLESON: What else does it say?

JIMMY: I don't know. I didn't really want to look. I came right over here.

JUDGE KITTLESON: Got a picture of you and me kissing?

JIMMY: From the elevator.

JUDGE KITTLESON: What has - How do I find this… this web site?

JIMMY: I don't know. Lindsay found it.

JUDGE KITTLESON: What's her number?

JIMMY: She's probably home by now.

JUDGE KITTLESON: What's her number?

EUGENE: The only one with a master key is the super. A guy by the name of Larry Connelly. You know him?

LUCY: Oh, my god.

BOBBY: What?

LUCY: Well, he always kind of looks at me funny. And a few weeks ago…

BOBBY: A few weeks ago what?

LUCY: He said that there was a leak in the downstairs apartment and he needed to check my bathroom. It's gotta be him.

BOBBY: Lindsay, call the police, get a warrant and see if we can search this guy's­

LINDSAY: Woah, woah, woah. A warrant for what?

BOBBY: To search this guy's place.

LINDSAY: Bobby, it's not so easy. He hasn't necessarily committed a crime.

LUCY: What do you mean he hasn't committed a crime?

LINDSAY: There was no sound on the video.

BOBBY: So?

LINDSAY: The law prohibits intercepting audio communication, but silent video taping… isn't a crime.

REBECCA: Well, you gotta be kidding.

BOBBY: What?

LUCY: This guy planted a camera in my bathroom. That's not a crime?

LINDSAY: No.

BOBBY: All right. What about trespass?

LINDSAY: The super with a master key? And you said he asked permission to go into your bathroom.

LUCY: This guy planted a camera in my home.

LINDSAY: I'm just saying it isn't as easy as it looks.

JUDGE KITTLESON: So this is what people think of me.

JIMMY: It's just a stupid website.

JUDGE KITTLESON: This goes into people's homes. Lawyers who appear before me, they've probably all seen this.

JIMMY: I'm sure some have, not all. Look, no one believes this stuff.

JUDGE KITTLESON: You believed it! That's why you came running down here so angrily. You believed it.

JIMMY: Well. Is it all true?

JUDGE KITTLESON: Some of it is. I have been with some of these men. How could - This is my private life!

JIMMY: Welcome to the information age, Judge.

REBECCA: I got it.

BOBBY: What?

REBECCA: You pay your own utilities, right?

LUCY: Yeah.

REBECCA: Theft of electricity. He plugged his equipment into your outlets. There's some case law. Theft of electricity.

LINDSAY: That sounds like a stretch.

BOBBY: It'll buy us a warrant. Get Eugene.

LUCY: Will he go to jail?

BOBBY: He's being arraigned today. I told Jimmy to cover it. But, Lucy, the law of stealing electricity, maybe trespass… He won't do any time. Hey.

LUCY: What if my father ­

BOBBY: You said he doesn't own a computer.

LUCY: Yeah, but what if somebody makes a tape off the computer and ­

BOBBY: Look, you did nothing wrong.

LUCY: Well, can I sue him?

BOBBY: Well, you could, but he's pretty judgement proof. He did lose his job. I mean, that's something.

LUCY: Um, I should get back to work.

BOBBY: Uh, you wanna take the day off?

LUCY: And do what? Go home? No, I'm fine. I got a lot of work to do. I'm doing fine.

BOBBY: Lucy. The reason you feel so violated is because you have been. And this is no time to play tough. Look at me. Maybe this isn't the equivalent to rape, but that man took your privacy from you. That's not nothing. It wouldn't be a bad idea to get some counselling.

LUCY: Okay.

BOBBY: And it wouldn't be a bad idea to lean on people here a little.

JUDGE KITTLESON: Theft of electricity? Are they prosecuting that these days?

ADA: Your honour, the defendant is a superintendent at an apartment complex. He installed cameras to tape one of the dwellers, then he uploaded her naked images on the internet. Theft of electricity ­

JUDGE KITTLESON: Hold on a second. Well, well, well, Mr Connelly. Did you get the wrong judge.

OLSEN: We'll waive reading, your honour.

JUDGE KITTLESON: Why don't you wave goodbye while you're at it? Did you have fun invading a young woman's privacy?

OLSEN: Excuse me, your honour?

JUDGE KITTLESON: Counsel, you speak when I ask you to. Uploading her naked images on the internet? Funny, I just discovered things about me on the internet. Maybe there's stuff about all of us. Who knows. Take off your pants.

OLSEN: Your honour!

JUDGE KITTLESON: Bailiff! Would you please take Mr Olsen into custody. He's in contempt.

OLSEN: What?

JUDGE KITTLESON: You want another chance? Then shut your mouth! Mr Connelly, drop your pants right now, or I will add contempt to your charges and you will go straight to a jail cell. I am going to count to three. 1… 2…

JUDGE KITTLESON: No underwear. Figures. And nothing much else, I might add. Do you feel violated, Mr Connelly? Exposed? How does it feel? Turn around and face the gallery. Show them what you haven't got.

ADA: Your honour, even I have to say this is a little bit irregular.

JUDGE KITTLESON: Tough! Turn around, Mr Connelly. Take Mr Connelly. Put him in jail. We can arraign him again tomorrow. Would you call the next case, please? Leave your pants right there! At your ankles.

JIMMY: That was different.

JUDGE KITTLESON: Imagine his luck! Getting me for a judge. Of all days ­

JIMMY: Are you okay?

JUDGE KITTLESON: I am so - You know, I am no prude. I would have no problems taking the bench naked, so long as it were my choice. But to be -

JIMMY: Well, hopefully the laws on internet stuff will start to change. Maybe the test case will come before you.

JUDGE KITTLESON: It did bother you, reading all that stuff, didn't it, Jimmy?

JIMMY: Yeah, but, you know, it's my mother's influence. In the back of my mind I guess I was still hoping you were a virgin.

JUDGE KITTLESON: Yes, we all know you thought that. Thank you.

JIMMY: For what?

JUDGE KITTLESON: For being there. It helped.