Bad Blood (5x12)
MULDER: Too bad. We got 'em. Check it out.
SCULLY: Well, these may be syringe marks. Their placement meant to emulate fangs. Such ritualistic blood-letting points towards cultists of some sort, in which case... What?
MULDER: Yeah, that's probably it, satanic cultists. Come on, Scully.
SCULLY: You're not gonna tell me you think it's that Mexican goat sucker thing.
MULDER: El Chupacabra? No, they got four fangs, not two, and they suck goats, hence the name.
SCULLY: So, instead, this would be...
MULDER: Classic vampirism.
SCULLY: Of a bunch of cows.
HARTWELL: Now ... now, isn't there some kind of disease that makes a person think that they're a vampire?
SCULLY: Well, there is a psychological fixation called hematodipsia which causes the sufferer to gain erotic satisfaction from consuming human blood.
HARTWELL: Erotic. Yeah.
SCULLY: Mmm. There are also genetic afflictions which cause a heightened sensitivity to light, uh, to garlic -- porphyria, xeroderma pigmentosum.
HARTWELL: You really know your stuff, Dana.
SCULLY: Heart weighs 370 grams, tissue appears healthy. Left lung weighs 345 grams, tissue appears healthy. Large intestine ... 890 grams, yada yada yada... Stomach contents show last meal close to the time of death, consisting of ... pizza. Topped with pepperoni, green peppers, mushrooms ... mushrooms ... That sounds really good.
MULDER: I think that what we *may* be looking at is what appears to be a series of vampire or vampire-like acts.
SCULLY: On what do you base that?!
MULDER: Uh ... well, on the corpses drained of blood and the fang marks on the neck. But, as always, I'm very eager to hear your opinion.
SCULLY: Well, it's obviously not a vampire.
MULDER: Well, why not?
SCULLY: Because they don't exist?
MULDER: Vampires have always been with us, in ancient myths and stories passed down from early man. From the Babylonian Ekimu to the Chinese Kuang-Shi to Motetz Dam of the Hebrews, the Mormo of ancient Greece and Rome to the more familiar Nosferatu of Transylvania.
MULDER: Still, that leaves us in something of a quandary because there are as many different kinds of vampires as there are cultures that fear them. Some don't even subsist on blood. The Bulgarian Ubour, for example, eats only manure.
SCULLY: Thank you.
MULDER: To the Serbs, a prime indicator of vampirism is red hair. Some vampires are thought to be eternal. Others are thought to have a life span of only 40 days. Sunlight kills certain vampires while others come and go as they please, day or night.
SCULLY: If there's a point, Mulder, please feel free to come to it.
MULDER: My point is that we don't know exactly what we're looking for. What kind of vampire, or if you prefer, what kind of vampire this killer wishes himself to be.
MULDER: Historically, certain types of seeds were thought to fascinate vampires. Chiefly oats and millet, but you make do with what you have. Remember when I said before that we didn't know what type of vampire we were looking for?
MULDER: Well, oddly enough, there seems to be one obscure fact which in all the stories told by the different cultures is exactly the same, and that's that vampires are really, really obsessive-compulsive. Yeah, you toss a handful of seeds at one, no matter what he's doing he's got to stop and pick it up. If he sees a knotted rope, he's got to untie it. It's in his nature. In fact, that's why I'm guessing that our victim's shoelaces were untied.
SCULLY: You're saying that I actually hit him two times?
MULDER: Square in the chest. No effect.
SCULLY: And then he sort of flew at me like a flying squirrel?
MULDER: Well, I don't think I'll use the phrase "flying squirrel" when I talk to Skinner, but... yeah, that's what happened.
SCULLY: But Mulder, he had fake fangs. Why would a real vampire need fake fangs? I mean, for the sake of argument.
MULDER: Fangs are very rarely mentioned in the folklore. Real vampires aren't actually thought to have them. It's more an invention of Bram Stoker's. I think maybe you were right before when you said that this is just a guy who's watched too many Dracula movies. He just happens to be a real vampire.