The One With The Two Parties (222)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever With Ross`s Wedding Part I and II Season 5 After Ross Said Rachel With All The Kissing Hundredth Where Phoebe Hates PBS With All The Kips With The Yeti Where Ross Moves In With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks With Ross's Sandwich With The Inappropriate Sister With All The Resolutions With Chandler's Work Laugh With Joey's Bag Where Everyone Finds Out With The Girl Who Hits Joey With A Cop With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss Where Rachel Smokes Where Ross Can't Flirt With The Ride Along With The Ball With Joey's Big Break In Vegas (Season Finale/Hour Long Episode) Season 6 After Vegas Where Ross Hugs Rachel With Ross's Denial Where Joey Loses His Insurance With Joey's Porsche With The Last Night Where Phoebe Runs With Ross's Teeth Where Ross Got High With The Routine With The Apothecary Table With The Joke With Rachels Sister Where Chandler Can't Cry That Could Have Been (Parts 1 & 2) With The Unagi Where Ross Dates A Student With Joey's Fridge With Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad Where Paul's The Man With The Ring With The Proposal(Season Finale) With Monica\'s Thunder With Rachel's Book With Phoebe's Cookies With Rachel's Assistant With The Engagement Picture With The Nap Partners With Ross's Library Book Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs With All The Candy With The Holiday Armadilio With All The Cheesecakes Where They're Up All Night Where Rosita Dies Where They All Turn Thirty With Joey's New Brain With The Truth About London With The Cheap Wedding Dress With Joey's Award With Ross and Monica's Cousin With Rachel's Big Kiss With The Vows With Chandler's Dad Season 8 After 'I Do' With The Red Sweater Where Rachel Tells... With The Videotape With Rachel's Date With The Halloween Party |
MONICA: Joey they're not real. I start miles beneath the surface of these things, ok, they're fake. See. Honk honk. CHANDLER: Wow, it's, it's like porno for clowns. PHOEBE: Ok, here are the birthday candles. Where's the birthday cake? MONICA: Ok, we're not having birthday cake, we're having birthday flan. CHANDLER: Excuse me? MONICA: It's a traditional Mexican custard dessert. JOEY: Oh that's nice. Happy birthday Rachel, here's some goo. MONICA: Dr. Greene. Oh my God it's Rachel's dad. What're you doing here? MR. GREENE: What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday? MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye. MR. GREENE: Ohhh, you're having a parteee. MONICA: No, no, not a party. Just a surprise gathering of some people Rachel knows. Um, this is Phoebe and Chandler and Joey. MR. GREENE: I'll never remember all of that. So uh, what's the deal? Rachel comes home, people pop out and yell stuff, is that it? CHANDLER: This isn't your first surprise party, is it, Sir? MRS. GREENE: Hi Monica. MONICA: Chinese menu guy. Forgot the menus. CHANDLER: So, basically just a Chinese guy. MRS. GREENE: Well, my goodness, what was that? MONICA: Sandra, I am so sorry, I thought you were Rachel and we just weren't ready for you yet. MRS. GREENE: You thought I was Rachel? CHANDLER: Yes because uh, you look so young. PHOEBE: And because you're both, you know, white women. MONICA: So uh, Joey and Chanlder, I, I think it's time that you take Dr. Greene over to your place. CHANDLER: Uhh, yes, absolutely, um. Why again? MONICA: Because that's where the party is you goon. See this is just the staging area. JOEY: Right this is staging. CHANDLER: Yeah, this, more than anything else, is the staging area. CHANDLER: Alright you guys are off to party number one and you, you are off to party number two. Alright fellas, let's keep it movin', let' keep it movin. MONICA: Chandler could you at least send some women to my party? RACHEL: Ohh, thank you for the wonderful dinner. ROSS: Thanks for being born. RACHEL: Ohh, thank you for my beautiul earrings, they're perfect. I love you. ROSS: Oh, now you can exchange them if you want, ok. RACHEL: Now I love you even more. RACHEL: Both of them are here, both of them, both of them are here? CHANDLER: Well, we could count again. RACHEL: I can't believe this is happening. ROSS: You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday, this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, who cares. RACHEL: I do. ROSS: That's who. CHANDLER: Look, are you gonna be ok? RACHEL: Well, I have to be, I don't really have a choice, I mean, you know, I could look at the bright side, I get two birthday parties and two birthday cakes. CHANDLER: Well, actually just one birthday flan. RACHEL: What? CHANDLER: It's a traditional Mexican custard dessert...Look talk to Monica, she's on the food committee. CHANDLER: Joey, Joey. Hey, some girl just walked up to me and said, 'I want you Dennis,' and stuck her tongue down my throat. I love this party. JOEY: Quick volleyball question. CHANDLER: Volleyball. JOEY: Yeah, we set up a court in your room. Uh, you didn't really like that grey lamp, did you? CHANDLER: Joey, a woman just stuck her tongue down my throat, I'm not even listening to you. GIRL'S VOICE: Dennis. CHANDLER: Ok, that's me. MONICA: Ok people, I want you to take a piece of paper, here you go, and write down your most embarassing memory. Oh, and I do ask that when you're not using the markers, you put the caps back on them because they will dry out. ROSS: Hi Dr. Greene. So, uh, how's everything in the uh, vascular surgery... game? MR. GREENE: It's not a game Ross, a woman died on my table today. ROSS: I'm sorry. See that's the good thing about my job. All the dinosaurs on my table are already dead. MONICA: Listen you guys, I don't mean to be a pain about this but, um, I've noticed that some of you are just placing them on. You wanna push the caps until you hear them click. Gunther, where're you going? GUNTHER: I um, was sorta thinking about maybe... MONICA: No. No you can't go. No this is fun. Come on we're just getting started. Here, here's your marker. PHOEBE: Listen if you wanna go, just go. GUNTER: No, she'll yell at me again. PHOEBE: Alright, I can get you out. GUNTHER: What? PHOEBE: Shh. In a minute, I'm gonna create a diversion. When I do, walk quickly to the door and don't look back. MR. GREENE: I think I need a drink. ROSS: Oh, here, I, I'll get it for ya. Whad'ya want? MR. GREENE: Scotch. ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass. MR. GREENE: Neat. ROSS: Cool. MR. GREENE: No no no, no no no, neat, as in no rocks. ROSS: I know. MRS. GELLER: Ross, whose glasses are those? ROSS: Mine. MRS. GREENE: You wear bi-focals? ROSS: Um-hmm. I have a condition, apparently, that I require two different sets of focals. MRS. GREENE: Did you know my husband has glasses just like that? RACHEL: Well those are very popular frames. MRS. GREENE: Rachel, you didn't tell me your boyfriend smoked. RACHEL: Yeah, like a chimney. ROSS: Ohh, big smoker. Big big smoker. In fact I'm gonna go out into the hallway and fire up this bad boy. MR. GREENE: Are you wearing my glasses? ROSS: Yes. I was just warming up the earpieces for you. MR. GREENE: Thank you. Is that one of my cigarettes? ROSS: Yeah, yes it is, I was just moistening the tip. PHOEBE: Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out of here but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute. GIRL 1: What about my friend Victor? PHOEBE: No, only the three of you, any more than that and she'll get suspicious. GIRL 1: Alright, let me just get my coat. PHOEBE: There isn't time. You must leave everything. They'll take care of you next door. GIRL 1: Is it true they have beer? PHOEBE: Everything you've heard is true. MONICA: Could you guys please try to keep it down, we're trying to start a Boggle tournament. You, and you, you're supposed to be at my party. And Gunther! What are you doing here? GUNTHER: Um. PHOEBE: Ok, welcome to the fu-oh. MONICA: Phoebe. PHOEBE: Alright, I'm sorry but these people needed me. They work hard all week, it's Saturday night, they deserve to have a little fun. Go. MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bonsai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
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transcribed by Joshua Hodge
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